I used to feel relationships should not have a cost, that you should be there if someone needs you unconditionally.
That is until I realized I kept giving good advice and those same people repetitively asked the same questions hoping for different answers because they changed one small non-impactful thing rather than hearing what I was saying at all.
For example:
“Should I take him back because he said he won’t beat/cheat on me?”
“No, cycles of abuse can’t be just “fixed” in months or years without genuine effort and support from someone other than their family/friends.”
3 months after she takes him back and we’re back to the couple broken up… SAME QUESTION…..
~my life~
An individual gets to a point where there has to be some sort of “cost” because that “friend” is simply just taking spoons/time to choose to not listen to the advice they claim they want.
So, stop and think of what has gone on and see if there may be an imbalance in the friendship (them feeling like they are always giving and you are always taking) that has brought it to this point.
Yea, I hate to be the jerk to point this out, but truly good friendships are not free, but should just be genuinely sincere. Even if it means saying, “Hey, you might be the asshole if…”
